Thursday, August 13, 2009

Remembering


My middle daughter's dorm room that she shared with another nursing student, in soft pinks. As for my oldest daughter's dorm room...I know I was too sad in saying "good bye" to her, to take any pictures, after all she was the first to leave home.

"If you've ever been a part of the following scene, you know you'll never forget it.
Inside the house is a quiet bedroom. Last spring's prom photo sits on the bedside table. A dried homecoming mum hangs from the bulletin board. Outside the house is a packed car. Both trunk and seat are full of clothes, books and stereo. What was in the room is now in the car. The one who used to live in the room is about to drive the car...to college.
Both parent and child are stunned by the moment. What happened to childhood? Who fast-forwarded the years? Why, just yesterday this child was filling the house with cartwheels and playdough--now look. He's so tall. She's such a beauty. The child is grown.
The grown child is equally stunned. The road ahead looks lonely and long. There is safety in these walls. Protection. Security. Those pleas for independence so recently voiced are unheard today. "Just say the word, Dad, "I'll stay. Just ask me , Mom, I won't leave."
But Mom and Dad know better. They know that love releases the loved. They know the training is over. The last bell has rung. The class is dismissed, and the application begun.
And so parents and child hesitate at the side of the car. There's no time to teach new truths. There's no time to instill values or lay foundations. There is only one word that can be said--remember. Remember who loves you. Remember what matters. Remember what is right and what is wrong.
Remember. "

~Max Lucado


This is my youngest daughter's room that she shared with two more girls. She chose navy and cream for her room.

As I walked through the store today, I was surrounded by parents purchasing back to school notebooks, pencils, pens, and markers. Each child seemed to know what it was they needed. So many memories came flooding back into this mother's heart. So many "first day back" experiences, what to take, what to wear, and how would it all go????
Next came all of the graduations...with everything that involves. And yes, then it was facing the challenge of each girl leaving for their further education. Sometimes I find myself not being able to believe that even those years are behind me. My husband has been the steadfast anchor for me through all the many phases. Together we have survived that aspect of our lives. I was thinking of all you mothers out there, who will be saying "good bye" soon to those you love, whether they are going on to school, or wherever. There may be tears, they will be missed, but coming from this mother with years of experience in this realm of life...the years do go by so quickly, and it is exciting to see where their individual journeys will take them.

18 comments:

Thoughts on Life and Millinery. said...

Such memories...yet ours were SO different! We moved and left our daughter behind...then moved again and left our son behind!
When I moved out to my dorm, I was at church camp. My mom and my grandmother (an estranged grandmother) moved my stuff in...and my room mate met my grandmother before I ever had!

No tears. We as a family as so happy with each new adventure we each get to go on. It makes life interesting!

Kathleen said...

Sadly, my daughter's leaving for college is connected to so many painful memories that, I fear, it's just one among them. It's a long story (20+ years ago), but hubby decided to leave home at the same time. I think I cried for four solid months. (We worked it out eventually)

To this day, school books and dorm rooms remind me of how desperately I have needed the Lord at times in my life. He has never failed, and I am the stronger for Him.

Blessings,
Kathleen

Anonymous said...

What an appropriate post today for me. I just returned home for caring for my adult daughter who had emergency surgery 2 weeks ago. Life threatening. Home finally after 10 days in hospital. Home with a feeding tube and drainage tube and 1 child off to highschool and one to 6th grade. Still to sick to help them with those special days. Rachel is such a strong woman. 2 more weeks of nightly tube feeds. It is my Rachel who it seems was just off to college and my heart was aching. It is aching today.
QMM

Anonymous said...

What an appropriate post today for me. I just returned home for caring for my adult daughter who had emergency surgery 2 weeks ago. Life threatening. Home finally after 10 days in hospital. Home with a feeding tube and drainage tube and 1 child off to highschool and one to 6th grade. Still to sick to help them with those special days. Rachel is such a strong woman. 2 more weeks of nightly tube feeds. It is my Rachel who it seems was just off to college and my heart was aching. It is aching today.
QMM

Connie said...

What a nice post to look back at your transition and now having gone through it three times. I agree with your last sentence...there are tears, they grow up too fast but it is amazing to see their future endeavors and talents. Family gatherings are so much fun in this time of life.

Connie

Kim@Seasons of My Heart said...

What a GREAT post Judy!

I too, can hardly believe school is JUST around the corner. For us, it will be the 1st of a lot of lasts, as your youngest, Andrew will be a Senior!

I'm cherishing EVERY moment......

Judy said...

Now this post brings back the memories! We drove our daughter 18 hours away to college...and she had second thoughts when we arrived...and hoped we might take her back home with us. We left her there...and hoped for the best...and she had a wonderful year.

Now I'm thinking back-to-school as a grammy...and that's a different story.

Bethany said...

OH*MY*GOODNESS!!! Judy, I have tears pouring down my face! Eden, our oldest, will be 10 next week and I'm in shock about that right now. I've thought several times about what it's going to be like leaving her at college...and cried about it too. Every phase brings not only new challenges but also *praise God* new blessings! I'm desperate to be the mother my kids need me to be and to not 'mess up'. You and your sisters have been a beautiful example to me...I learned a lot those 4 years we lived in Lancaster. I am so grateful to know your amazing family! Thanks for sharing this today...I needed a good cry ;)
love ya, Judy
B

Anonymous said...

Oh this spoke to me so much, my daughter leaves for college tomorrow. Thank you for your encouraging words. x

Shelley said...

Sad and sweet at the same time! A good reminder for me to cherish my stepson's messy room here at home even more - LOL! I've got another 7 yrs to go till he goes to college...

Tracy said...

So beautifully shared, Judy and so very true! The years go by in a blur. Since sending Brennan off to college for the first time a couple of years back, my heart is always tender toward parents walking that journey at this time of year. You're right...as hard as it is, eventually you adjust and it is truly exciting to watch them pursue their dreams.

I loved seeing the contrast of your daughters' dorm rooms. = )

Have a wonderful day!
Tracy

Barb said...

Judy, I don't have children so I cannot relate....your post is touching. Your children are blessed to have had and continue to have a mother like you!

Barb

Marilou said...

Ok, this post even made ME sad! We are at such different places in life right now, you.. A grammy, me...still having a child (?) at home w/ 2 now in college. But things ARE changing SO fast and even being SOO much younger than you, I feel a bit "old"!! :) it's nice to know you've been there....and lived! So now instead of taking up drinking, I'll just call my big sister! :) HaHa!!! Just kidding! Thanks for the encouragement!
Love ya!

Happy@Home said...

This is such a timely post for back to school time. I'm sure that many mothers can relate. It is definitely a bittersweet time when our children go off to college. I think there is an empty feeling that takes a little bit of adjusting to.

Your daughter is so cute and looks like she keeps a very tidy room!!

Kathleen Grace said...

This is a tough time in our lives. Nobody warns you just how hard it is to let go and see them start their lives without you as the central player! I still take them to buy pencils and notebooks, gotta get that fun school shopping while I can! They grow up so fast, but this should be a reminder to us to treasure THIS time with them too. Great post Judy!

a woman who is said...

Well Judy you have me bawling on this one...waahhh!!! Just as I was missing my Jenna being away at school. I thank God for my grands that have been refocusing me on the future :)

By the way you have a simply gorgeous family.

Anonymous said...

It is so hard when our children leave home. I remember I cried for two weeks when our oldest son left. The time we have our children seems to go by so quickly. I think God sends us grandchildren to fill the void :>)

SeaWorthy said...

That was the most awesome post I have read in a long time!

Love ya, and your love for your family..pure unadulterated perfection.
Your a pretty good lookin little gra-mama, too!!
xoxo
from the beach!
Lisa
coastal nest

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